Thursday 14 November 2013

LEAKED LIB DEM REPORT: BRITAIN’S NUKES GRAMMATICALLY INCORRECT



A leaked Liberal Democrat report has shed light on the party’s reasons for wanting to reduce Britain’s Trident nuclear missile submarine fleet from four to three vessels.  Senior party officials are now convinced that the current four ship fleet is ‘grammatically incorrect’, as the ‘tri’ in Trident suggests three not four submarines.

A Lib Dem spokesman - briefing off the record - confirmed the report’s existence, saying he was “terribly worried that the Russians might think we were trying to trick them.” He continued: “We must either reduce the number of subs to three or at least consider renaming them Quadrant or something.”

Senior Naval Sources were unimpressed by the report’s central argument, pointing out that the KGB can probably read Wikipedia on their iPhones and therefore know exactly how many subs there are.